Le Tour and the Cookie Monster

So there’s a lot going on. The Tour started last Saturday, there’s apparently no clear leader just yet (unless you consider Kim Kirchen a contender for the overall which would be something of a mistake), and somehow, Stefan Schumacher won the first individual time trial.

Where the hell did that come from? What in the world did Schumacher snort or inject to pull a performance like that out of his ass? What was also interesting is that Phil Liggett made a post-race note that Johan Bruyneel had tipped his hat to Schumacher to win the first time trial and what that tells me is that Bruyneel probably sold Schumacher whatever it was that he either injected or snorted to go as fast as he did.

But hey, maybe I’m just being a cynic. But I don’t think so. Schumacher beat Cancellara? I’d tip my hat to drugs. Lots of drugs.

Speaking of drugs, Mr. Manuel My-Doctor-Forgot-To-Tell-Me-There’s-A-New-Test-That-Can-Detect-EPO Beltran just got tagged for EPO use and they’re saying he’s the fourth of Armstrong’s previous teammates who’s been busted for drug use. And one of Armstrong’s frozen B urine samples from 1999 (or 2000) tested positive for EPO once they finally had a test that could detect EPO. And there’s a lot of circumstantial evidence that Lance was doping his entire career, so why in the world can someone believe Lance won clean?

Did I say that?

You know what was nice about watching the media coverage regarding Beltran? All the Versus boys completely tore him apart. Phil Liggett, Paul Sherwen, Bob Roll, and Craig Hummer all did nothing other than rake the jackass over the coals with some rather harsh words for typically boring-ass commentators.

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Right now it’s Sunday night. Spent the weekend in Connecticut meeting/visiting with the fiancée’s family and when we returned home this evening, I caught up with yesterday’s TdF stage (handily DVR’d for my viewing pleasure) and watched as Mark Cavendish completely destroyed the field for the sprint to the line.

God almighty, that boy is freakishly fast. Can you imagine how much fun it must be to say to strangers, “Hey. Buddy. Give me a flat road and I am the fastest bike rider on the face of the earth?” I mean, the guy gives new meaning to the term, “Ride it like you stole it.” Imagine if that kid was a bike thief?

Still, if the kid ever fails a drug test, I’ll personally break both of his goddam legs. I don’t care if he picks up a Tom Boonen-like coke problem, but if we find out he’d been taking anything illegal to boost those incredible performance’s of his, I’ll kill him.

Speaking of sprinters, it’s starting to look like Robbie McEwen’s age is catching up with him (and I only say that from a spectator’s point of view as the guy would make me look like a little girl if I ever tried to bring it in his presence). Not only has the Aussie not won a sprint, but judging from the replays, it doesn’t seem like he’s been anywhere even near the front when Cavendish has been running all over everybody.

That’s all I’ve got for now. While I do have some interesting personal news related to cycling (thank god) and a new picture to share, it’s late and I’ve gotta get some rest but check back soon for another update.